Hot off the stove

Rumors! I try not to pay very much attention to them. Remember when people were talking about Barry Bonds DH-ing in Minnesota? Barry. Freaking. Bonds. I am having a hard time thinking of a player who would fit WORSE into the Twins organization. Barry Bonds is a big ol' plate of crazy!

My point being: most trade rumors are ridiculous hogwash! But let's induldge the crazies for a moment, shall we?

The Hot Stove: It's the Johan Santana show! Starring everyone's favorite Cy Young winner, he of the razor-thin goatee and sexiest accent ever! He's going to the Yankees (Shocked! I am shocked! -Ed.) or perhaps Los Angeles--both the Angels and the Dodgers have been thrown around. Other sources (ESPN) include the Mets and the Red Sox. These being the only teams that could possibly take on 6 years and 130m. He's got a full no-trade clause and likely won't waive it without a long, fat contract with the new team. Veeeeery interesting. I personally hate the Dodgers and the Mets the least out of those teams, so I hope he goes to either. If he goes. I hope he doesn't go. Think we could get Jose Reyes and David Wright from the Mets? David Wright is fine.

I'm very sorry to report this, Nicky, but I hadn't actually heard it before: Matt Garza to the Rays for Delmon Young. Who? The Rays have trade-worthy players, really? If you say so. Mentioning Matt Garza gives me an excuse to post the Best Roster Photo Ever:

Over at FOXSports.com, the always-erudite Ken Rosenthal kindly informs us that trading for Santana will be really expensive. Wow. You don't say!